anyresemblance

Nourishing soup

I'm making lists.  Phoning utilities.  Ordering boxes (and a tape gun which I recall being highly recommended by someone to Lisa when she was moving).  Throwing things out.  I sent four parcels of clothes to my friend, K, in Qld yesterday.  Then she called me to say she would be in Sydney on Friday but it still felt good to have got them out of my cupboard.  I think I have to dump some books too.  Which is hard for me since they are like my friends but I have to look at ditching some of those paperbacks I will never read again.  I'm looking forward to getting rid of some clutter.

The cats are grumpy.  We have concluded that our fat grey one has never adjusted to life in a Sydney terrace.  He misses lounging under the lavendar and hates having to climb stairs to sleep on someone's bed so we are hoping he will like our roof garden.  I'm lobbying for a worm farm.  I know I can't have chickens but I'd like something to get through the vegetable waste that accumulates.  The children are very anti but that's because they are imagining worms wriggling their way down the patio.

Last night I made vegetable soup with carrot, celery, potato, leek, cannellini beans, and parsley.  Very nourishing and very appropriate for the weather.  And apple crumble which was rib-sticking.  Tonight we'll eek it out with more vegetables and some soup pasta.   

I've been thinking that I need to accept that my life is now in Sydney and focus on generating some friendships here.  I miss my old friends but life is here now for me and the children.  And life is not so bad when you stop whining.

Don't even ask

I'm in a rage.  The words integrity and honesty and trust seem to figure largely in this.

Plus when the weather is dreary and grey and it's drizzling, what is the point of living in Australia?  I might as well be living in London when I can take a stroll around the bloody Tate Modern.

Just don't even ask.

Untold riches

I got a measly pay rise today.  It won’t cover the rent increase but it was better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. It came along with a cup of tea with my boss.  We sat in the courtyard café of the hospital.  I was wearing a shirt dress which my daughter had scathingly derided in the morning.  “Why don’t you just put your slippers on since you seem to be wearing your dressing gown” she had sneered.  My boss speculated that if we could hang around in emergency I might be mistaken for a patient.  Since I was worried he would make me cry this seemed like not a bad idea.  I didn’t cry since he was very, very nice to me and felt very bad about the small amount of money he was able to give me.  I am such a sucker for hard luck stories.

Life is slow and fast at the same time.  My children have snivelling colds and are worn out.  Thank goodness the end of term is in sight.  I got my older daughter’s school report.  Plenty of “she is a pleasure to teach” and a rave from her French teacher about how fantastic she is but a pathetic “her sports uniform is always impeccable”.  So the best he could say was that she was neat?  Which she isn’t.

I made a lemon syrup cake on the weekend.  And risotto with prosciutto, lemon and olives.  Both were excellent and reminded me that I am capable of cooking.  My daughter asked me why I didn’t cook so much in this house.  I told her it was too lonely in the kitchen.  I like to be able to see or talk to people when I am cooking.

I am reading so slowly these days it shames me.  I am reading this which I really like.  I don’t know what the life of a Thai sex worker is really like but this writer certainly challenges some western preconceptions about it.

On the move again

In new news I have found somewhere else to live.  It's smaller and more expensive but the living space is configured much better and it has a huge and beautiful outdoor terrace with a 180 view of the ocean, a lighthouse and the harbour.  It is within brisk walking distance of my children's schools, a grassy expanse in front of it, an ocean footpath, nice local shops and a bus route into town.  A double lock up garage with lots of storage space and a dishwasher (hurrah).

On the downside, it is small bedrooms.  I have impressed upon my children the vital importance of down-sizing, de-cluttering and being tidy in this flat.  Of course, they nod their heads earnestly but we'll see.

I have to break the lease on my current space but I am not too worried about that since I think it will re-let quite easily and I have prepared financial contingencies if there is a bit of a delay.  It feels good to be simplifying again though no doubt there will be several trips to Ikea for the ideal storage unit.

Last night we went to see this.  Very boring and very loud.  All the characters shout at each other all the time.  There is no clever conversational repartee, they all have to yell.  I have a headache today.  The only bit I laughed at was the penguins who had escaped to Antartica looking out at the blizzard and saying "well, this sucks".  But the lemurs were great and Sacha Barron-Cohen as the voice of King Julian of the lemurs had me snickering.

Tomorrow my daughter's team plays in the basketball final.  The coach of the opposing team is this man.  Even though my daughter's team won last time, I was impressed with how well he coached his team and how funny and self-deprecating he was.  I'm looking forward to this game.  Even her father, notorious sports-hater, is coming up to see her play.

Go 'way evil

My nun in training had her reconciliation last night.  I understand this event to go under several different titles:  confession, reconciliation and some others I can’t recall.  The priest introduced himself to me as we sat down.  Hello, I’m Tony Doherty.  Which would have been a nice touch if he hadn’t been introduced to me three times in the last month already.  It was actually a very sweet event.  He had a beautifully embroidered stole on which he told us had come from his parishioners in Chile.  He talked about how sometimes you just wanted to do the right thing and ended up doing the wrong thing but it was ok as long as you acknowledged it and tried really hard the next time.  I could see my nun in training was taking it all in.  Then all the children went up one by one and had a little talk with Father T on the bench beside the altar about their transgressions and got absolution and a certificate and it was all over. A charming antidote to the Hillsong leaning of the hip hop version of the Lord’s Prayer she was singing in the kitchen earlier in the evening.  Then we went and ate ice cream in Double Bay – we had coconut, hazelnut, walnut, chocolate and vanilla.  Yum.

Green eyes

I took the day off on Friday to extend the long weekend and took the children down to Cooma to the farm where they rode their horses.  The drive down was interminable.  I was so tired and had to keep stopping.  I love the people who run the farm but the chaos of the house, the number of people coming and going, the clutter of the farmyard, all make me a teensy bit uncomfortable.  I do so love order.  Plus the father of my children decided to turn up a day early, fortunately without girlfriend in tow, but he still managed to dampen my spirits.  I talked to him about having the children for a weekend in two weeks when I am planning to come down and visit a friend and he started to tell me he would be really busy with work.  I don't get it.

I left the children there Saturday and drove back to Sydney in the rain.  Actually the drive was ok and I found the time on my own peaceful.

The rest of the weekend was low key but grown up.  But you know when you're with someone and they let their phone ring without picking it up and ignore the messages coming through on their mobile and are a little bit cagey then alarm bells start ringing in my head.  Just a feeling but not a good one.

We went to Ikea this afternoon with the expressed intention of buying a stainless steel cutlery holder.  I ended up spending $40 on candles, plastic storage containers and a bed side lamp.  Not that it wasn't value for money but I spent more than I meant to.

I'm on the hunt for somewhere new to live.  I saw a fabulous apartment but it was gone by the time I phoned back and on reflection this was probably a good thing as it was a bit small but it gives me an idea that there are better places out there.

Tonight I picked my children up from the airport and we came home and ate meatballs with spaghetti and played with the new horse and foal toy I bought youngest daughter.  Oldest daughter had a new lamp (see Ikea above).  They quarreled at bed time and I was a bit distressed that something that should have been calm and peaceful was a bit acrimonious but they are so tired I could have predicted it.

That was the week

I didn't mean to sound so gloomy so thanks for the cheering thoughts.

In the past week I have visited Canberra on a day trip with my friend.  The ostensible reason was to sort out some legal stuff but I also attended a retirement lunch of someone I like and respect a lot.  It was good to talk to him.  I had coffee with another friend which, of course, led to hanging around the jewellers and buying a beautiful ring with a moonstone in it.  I am paying it off gradually but am looking forward to the wearing of it.  The stone fascinates me since I keep thinking if I hold it at a certain angle I will catch a glimpse of something mysterious in its depths.

On the way back, we stopped for dinner at a country hotel.  It was a bizarre dining experience from the only other couple in the dining room glaring at each other across the table to the waitress asking if we would like to come and see the cellar where the prisoners used to be kept.

I was stunned to discover that I am way behind in the imelda stakes in the office.  One of my colleagues tells me she has 50 pairs of shoes.  Another has 100.  I think I may have around 15 and feel that I am lacking.  So I bought some Gary Castles crimson suede shoes on the weekend.  They look good.

There are some excellent sales on and I got some Collette Dinnigan underwear in David Jones.  Since I am not of the body shape to fit her clothes, I was surprised that the bras came in my size but that must come of designing for the UK knicker market.

I am investing in getting my children to see their dad more often.  They are missing him a lot and they need to spend time with him.  I have worked out that dumping Sydney riding lessons which are expensive, badly organised and not fun can fund a few more plane trips to Canberra.

Work is good but I am a bit behind and need to work hard this month.  I'm fitting into the team better which is a good thing.

I'm wondering if I need to give my older daughter more pocket money.  My current rule of thumb is half their age but $6 isn't going very far when you're 12.  I think I need to link it to some other items of responsibility though.  What do other people do?

I watched this with the children.  I had missed it at the cinema though older daughter had seen it.  I enjoyed the gloominess of it.  The children observed the differences from the books but did not seem upset by that.  The soundtrack was outstanding.  The letter from the parents at the end obviously inspired my younger daughter.  On Sunday evening she said "I'm just going to check the post box".  She came back in with an envelope addressed to me.  This is what she wrote:

Dear Mummy.  This letter is a very good way to tell you that I love you very much and that no matter what I say about hating you I will always love you no matter what and even when you die and go to heaven know my heart still blazes like a thousand flames with  love and passion.  Your loving I.